In April of this year, Pope Benedict was warmly received by so many Americans. Beginning with a press conference while en route to Washington, DC, he signaled an openness that surprised many, discussing candidly his shame and disappointment about what we have come to label “the priest scandal.” This straight-forward acknowledgement of both the sordid events related to sexual improprieties within the clergy and the subsequent mismanagement of the problem was heartening to many whose faith in the hierarchy had declined precipitously.

Lest any think that the topic was simply taken care of with that pre-emptive discussion, he raised it numerous times in his official remarks, most significantly in his address to the American bishops at the National Cathedral. While commending the steps they had taken to create “safe environments” for children, he offered a piercing indictment of western culture.

He implored bishops to assume their responsibility to protect children from degrading and crude imagery. “They have a right to be educated in authentic moral values rooted in the dignity of the human person …What does it mean to speak of child protection when pornography and violence can be viewed in so many homes through media widely available today? We need to reassess urgently the values underpinning society, so that a sound moral formation can be offered to young people and adults alike.”

Although the bishops were duly chastened by these cutting remarks, parents should have taken these words to heart as well, for they are responsible for much of the decline of “values underpinning society” by their own negligence. Women in particular—having the closer connection with their children—are called to be the gate-keepers of family culture.

Some might ponder how mothers can draw a line in the sand with the vile effects of our mass media all around them. From cell phones to music downloads, from You-tube to video porn, children have access to all sorts of degrading imagery—being able to defy the most vigilant parents should they wish. What can a parent do, short of encasing children in concrete towers?

Alone, it is tremendously difficult—if not impossible. But we are not alone. The goal of our spiritual Enemy is to fragment and isolate us in fear and confusion. The first step, then, is to ground ourselves in prayer and the sacraments. Confession of our own sins against purity is essential, so that we can regain our understanding of and appreciation for chastity.

The second step is to embrace the Church’s call to collaboration, which is key to the restoration of healthy relationships between men and women. In 2004, highlighting the twin dangers of exaggerating the differences between the sexes and blurring them, [then] Cardinal Ratzinger noted firmly that only genuine collaboration between men and women would provide the “vital difference” that would bring about communion and peace.

This means that children must be able to rely on both a mother and father committed to their well-being, that the mother must be able to rely on authentic masculine role models in the home and in the parish, and that the maternal gaze of Holy Mother Church is directed to God the Father in a proper way.

Angry or frightened women, isolated or distracted fathers, and the reduction of persons to sexual commodities destroy the communion to which we’re called. Grounding the children in healthy relationships will inoculate them from the unhealthy—or at least allow them to recognize them by their aberration from the good. Prayerful women must rely on this truth, and do their part to make all of society a “safe environment.”

Mrs. Kineke is the author of The Authentic Catholic Woman (Servant Books).